Self awareness is the conscious knowledge of oneself To be self aware is to be aware of and respond to one's feelings In Things Fall Apart Chinua Achebe delineates Okonkwo's self awareness through the journey of resistance and change Okonkwo does become aware of the changes around him however he does not respond to the change and is not fully self aware Throughout the novel Okonkwo is continuously under fear Fear of being thought unworthy Fear of being dominated by failure and weakness 13 His fear derives from his childhood As a young person he was very conscious about how people perceived him He felt ashamed of his father and held higher expectations for himself He had the fear of resembling his father 14 His relationship with his father is what affects his perception and view of the world around him the most Okonkwo began farming and harvesting yams at a young age He had to support himself his mother and sisters 22 His father had not been able to feed himself or his family In Umuofia age was respected and achievement was revered 8 The admiration he received gave him a sense of respect and success Over time he began to distance himself from his father and felt more accomplished and accepted by the rest of the town Okonkwo had one utmost goal to become a revered member and to possess the most titles Okonkwo's actions cost him greatly many times He was aware of the killing of his adopted son Ikemefuna He was specifically told by the oracle to not take part in the sacrifice
However, Okonkwo decided to take part in the actual killing even when Ikemefuna called for his help they have killed me 28 Okonkwo cared greatly for Ikemefuna however the judgment of looking weak overpowered his decision and led to the death of his loved son On multiple occasions Okonkwo beats his wives and children He is aware that he is abusive towards people Umuofia dictates that men have power over women He understands the order in his home however takes it too far when he beats his wife during the week of peace He left his wife and her only daughter weeping 38 Not only should a self-aware person be aware of his or her own character but also be aware of his or her surroundings Okonkwo should have acted rationally He is experienced with power but when the power became too excess it wrecked and played with his head After shooting the wall Okonkwo heaved a heavy sigh and went away with the gun 39 He thought about his actions after almost killing his own wife
At least this time his rash decisions did not end up with a dead family member Being unaware of the negative effects led to the abuse of his power and almost the death of close ones Okonkwo's actions sometimes made him more self aware and mindful of other people One event that Okonkwo was self aware and took action was after Ezinma Okonkwo's daughter was taken away in the middle of the night by Chielo Ekwefi Okonkwo's wife cried and followed her daughter through the dark knight Okonkwo cared and was worried about both his wife and his daughter s safety and security He followed close behind both comforted his wife and even showed some affection towards her Go home and sleep I shall wait here 108 Another moment Okonkwo's actions make him more self aware is when he accidentally kills another member during a funeral After the incident he finds hospitality and lives with his mother's family Mbanta He felt great shame that he could not pursue his goal and was distracted by the arrival of white men When the white men welcomed Okonkwo's son Nwoye Okonkwo thought Nwoye was not worth fighting for 153 He continued to convince himself that Umuofia would stay the same and welcome him back After being banished for seven years he went back to a town he didn't find worthy He was aware that the structure of the society had changed however he was incapable of handling or adapting to the change Even though he had the mindset to fight it was already too late A great evil that was coming and Okonkwo was not prepared 172 For Okonkwo to have the courage and the persitancy to fight he would have needed to leave his traditional beliefs behind Okonkwo was already resistant to change As the world he knew changed and moved on he could not move and stayed with the past If Okonkwo had been aware of both the individual and the community between the past and the present Norton 388 he would have been fully self aware If he had learned about the consequences of killing members of the community beating members of his family and hurting himself he wouldn't have killed himself and ended the life he had pursued midway Okonkwo does become aware of the changes around him however he does not respond to the change and is not fully self aware He lives a resistant journey
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